In Memory of Versace

Versace,

There is a hole in both my heart and my life since you’ve gone. They say grief is the price we pay for love, and wow – did I love you. As a new college graduate, from the first moment I saw you at the animal shelter, I knew I wanted to care for you and do life with you. And we did! You were a constant at my side as we left Seattle and took on NYC together for a few years, only to return to Seattle once we were ready to settle down a bit. You saw me through my first home purchase, a marriage, a second home purchase, and then two children. Not to mention multiple job changes over the years. With so many big decisions and changes in my life over the 19 years that I had you, you remained a constant – an unchanged and reassuring presence. Thank you.

I think of you often. I still instinctively look for you to greet me when I get home, Capone calls your name daily, and the rose bushes yearn to shade you from the sun once again. I remember our final days together, and in reflecting on them, I think I knew – deep down – that it was your time to go. I remember lying on the floor in the kitchen with you on your last night with us, giving you scritches and crying because I could tell in your purr that you were saying goodbye. The next morning, you rejected your pills as if to say “I am beyond those!”, and went outside and sought a peaceful place in the front yard (which was unusual) to lie down. Looking back, I wonder if that is where you wanted to rest on your final day, and if I should have left you there undisturbed, vs. bringing you indoors? You probably would have preferred remaining outside. I am sorry.

Perhaps I was expecting too much of you in asking you to stay with us longer. After 19 amazing years together, I was greedy; I could never have enough of you and couldn’t have loved you more. I miss you every day, and though I grieve, I am comforted knowing that you are happy and healthy, and are no longer burdened by the aches and pains that haunted you in this life. I’ll love you always, and I look forward to being with you again in a future life together.